L C McCarthy

I met a bloke, Nick, in the pub a while back – big beard, big personality, drinking gallons of beer – no, it wasn’t Brian Blessed – but he did seem familiar. Just moved here from Sweden as he didn’t care for how they utilised public money. He’s now having a rethink after viewing Scotland’s public debt and Reeves ‘vindictive clusterfuck’ (his words) of last week. He’s moving on in the New Year. He’s considering Greenland but isn’t sure who owns it.

He sent me this – thought it was weird. Asked me what he should do. I said don’t bother. You might as well give Reeves a ‘Calculator’ for Christmas as Rachel’s own is clearly in error – What’s his name again? Tarquin? No, that’s not right…

Clearly a lot of it is well above my pay grade. Personally, I had him down for a VR headset (great for blotting out genuine reality), or one of the Powderpuff dolls (Angela -the ginger one?). Or is it a Bratz..?

Difficult to tell….

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This is a work of fiction.